Fathers: Protect, Preside, Provide

According to The Family: A Proclamation to the World, “fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families.”  I don’t know why, but this statement always makes me think of Superman.  Maybe it is because my husband loves Superman so much, or maybe it is because he reminds me of Superman.  Men play such an important role in our world, although many would try to diminish that role.  Howard W. Hunter taught “a father’s leadership of the family is his most important and sacred responsibility”.

 As you might know, my husband suffers some unique physical challenges due to a childhood accident that make it difficult for him to fulfill some of the responsibilities typically associated with males.  It has been an interesting and wonderful experience to help him understand exactly what it means to be a husband and father.  One of the big questions he has is how he can preside.  Ezra Taft Benson provided insight on this issue when he defined the responsibility to preside as “provide love, teach, and direct.” All of these things, my husband is able to do so well.  

While another one of the responsibilities of a father is to provide, my husband and I have come to recognize this as more than just providing financially or providing food, clothing and shelter.  Part of it has to do with providing opportunities to learn, to grow, and to experience love.  My husband is very good about calming my fears and anxieties about the welfare of children.  My nephew recently told me that his mom is kind and sweet but she is a little bit overprotective.  His dad, on the other hand is the one who provides chances for adventure, who pushes him to try things that are a little scary, and gives him an emotional and physical safety net.

 The final responsibility of fathers that I would like to discuss today is the duty to protect.  While fathers physically protect their families, there are other ways that they protect as well.  My husband is so good at helping me feel safe and secure.  A thousand little ways each day, he helps me to see that he is actively and anxiously engaged in caring for and protecting me.  From wanting to sleep closest to the door in case we have an intruder, to never remembering to remind me to be safe as I leave the house, to praying for me and my physical, spiritual, and emotional well-being each day.  

Sean Brotherson gives another way that fathers can protect their families that is different than traditional views of protection.  He says, “Perhaps the most important aspect of protecting children occurs as fathers model appropriate and righteous behavior in their own actions and choices…mentor [children] to develop skills and knowledge needed for making their own wise choices in life.” 

When I think about the lessons my own father taught me, I remember the things that he said.  But even more than that, I remember the things that I watched him do.  The things he taught me because they were a core part of him.  Things like always working hard and having a good work ethic, loving God above all else, putting his spouse first, and having a consistent routine every day.  According to Sean Brotherson, “if men wish to receive honor in their efforts as fathers, then it is essential that they be worthy of honor.”  Certainly my father and my husband are honorable men.  A father’s influence lasts much longer than a fleeting moment of an individual interaction with a child.  Indeed, we can learn much about our Heavenly Father by watching the actions of our earthly husbands and fathers.